how do people read my story

i've been looking at a lot of famous peoples autobiographies and been thinking about how mine would sound if i started now and to where i am.

Where would i end and the "Author and Perfecter of my faith" start.?

would people notice?

would it be a smooth line like butter or as rough as driving from a dirt road to a highway.

my book would jump from a valley to a mountain.

From a innocent child, to a whole, to being whole.

But i start to think about it from right now. Because i can't go back and tell God that i want him to rewrite my past i have to think. "am i letting him write my tomorrow.

Did i let him write my today?

i pray that i am the pen in the hand of the creator and that no matter what happened in my life, he turns my biography into a work of art that reflects him.

Peace

Just like a Circus

Well the Circus has come and gone from Madison. I didn't go but it got me thinking about when I went to the Big Top as a kid.

I remember going to 2 different types of circus'.

The 1 ring circus, and the 3 ring circus.

The one ring circus was great. everyone watched the same thing. The ring leader in the middle, telling everyone to look at the elephant that was balancing on a giant ball. it was great for little kids, eyes wide open, looking in awe at all that consumes the name "CIRCUS".

And then you have the 3 ring circus... WOW 3 rings. It's almost more then anyone should be able to observe in one sitting. U don't know what to focus on. Is it the lion's jumping through fire, or is it clowns piling out of the mini car that calls my attention.

I think that our all our lives are one or the other. Have we upgraded to the chaos of the 3 rings or keep it simple with the 1.

I remember A man that I respect, talking about the lions one time and the purpose of the tamer using the chair to calm them. It's because of the confusion set in by the inability to focus on all 4 legs at the same time and it is rendered helpless.

right now my life feels like a 3 ring circus. There are VERY good and attention grabbing things in each ring but no focus on just one.

I long for the perception of God. that the ring he sees in my life, becomes the one that I see and focus on.

Too many of us are ok with the options. And options are good. But at some point i think we need to pray and ask God for his ultimate ring choice.

Where do it go from here, what does my future entail? do i move or stay put and hope that something that is so small becomes something big. or do i move to the thing that I know will be big even though the small will last for a bit.

I talked to a young man last week about his future. He's almost 19 and really has no vision for his life. high school is over, he wants more but not really driven for "more". he's happy not even thinking about 3 rings. the one he has now, the one he has always had, is 100% ok with him. Or that's what it seems like. Deep inside something grows, something becomes a passion , but with out any support, that one ring will never expand to an option of something more.

"o Lord how my heart longs for more of you"

The storm before the calm

So let just start out by saying the this week has been a struggle. My soul has been at battle with the devil like crazy.
I'm about to speak the word of God tomorrow night at youth and satan don't like it. He thinks he's beatin me and stolen somethin so far this week... I don't think so. Its been hard and I feel like I've given in but I know my God is strong and I know MY God is mighty and I know he will breakforth in my life like never before.
They always say. "The calm before the storm" but I feel like this week has been the storm before the calm. Something great is about to happen in my life and God has given my a very vulnerable spirit and heart towards him.
We love God. Then let's prove it. Let's show him just and ounce of the love that he shows us every second.

God bless
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